The Wizard's Book of Animal Secrets Just imagine! You control all the animals around you! Bees, birds, horses, frogs, squirrels and other animals respond quickly to your commands. Your cat uses the toilet bowl in your bathroom and your dog walks around on stilts. As you and a friend walk through a park or near a stand of trees, you casually whistle a few notes. Suddenly, FLOCKS of birds come swooping out of the trees at you! They land on your arms, shoulders and the palms of your hands. You whistle a few more notes and a squirrel jumps down off a branch and climbs up and into your pocket! Another few notes and a rabbit comes out from under a nearby bush and hops up to you! You make a few buzzing sounds and bees start to appear and fly about you. You hum a strange few notes and a swarm of gnats suddenly gather above your head. You tap your staff upon the ground and a school of fish start jumping and swirling in the waters of a nearby lake. A horse becomes unmanageable yet you stare it down and it allows you to pet its head. Your friends are simply dumbstruck by your skills and you're the talk of the town! You're a powerful wizard! This talent of superior animal control will simply amaze everyone! Before you begin... If you wish to have control over animals & creatures, you must have patience. When you attempt to teach a new trick to an animal or creature, you may have to repeat the same action command a half dozen times or more without seemingly having any real affect upon the animal. Keep yourself in good humor and temper. The animal is always confused to begin and it will take a bit of time before it will realize what is being asked of it. The animal will suddenly 'get it' and perform, often beginning when the teacher is about to give up all hope. It's only with constant repetition and familiarity with what's being asked of the animal that an action will be learned. Harsh punishment should only be used upon an animal that is willfully disobedient to your kindest commands. Such animals are very rare and the behavior indicates an un-trainable animal. Usually just a harsh word or mild tap will do as a form of punishment if called for at all. The best reward is food. If you withhold food when failure or an imperfect performance is displayed it becomes a much better punishment than slaps or blows. Repeat the action requested and reward the animal's good performance & behavior with small portions of food. This is the winning formula for success. It's well known that animals become accustomed to certain word-sounds and can handle a variety of different commands without confusion. But a word of warning: Only use the verbal command for a specific task in its proper place. For example; 'Whoa' is used to stop a horse that is moving forward. It should not be used when the rider is on the ground and trying to keep his animal still. It confuses the animal and perhaps the next time the rider commands whoa, the horse may pitch the rider to the ground, thinking that the rider wishes to stand alongside the horse. Don't confuse the animal with ill-timed commands that are out of sequence or out of place. A word about captivity… All ADULT wild animals will resist confinement when captured by humans. Any and all efforts to soothe them in their excited state will be to no avail. Give no food (but plenty of water) to the new captive until it lays down with exhaustion. As soon as the animal is quiet, the animal tamer should feed it, laying a base of future goodwill with the animal. Always wear thick gloves with new animals. Biting and scratching are the main weapons most animals have. They know how to use them! Offer food in your gloved hand. Remember, not having food for a short time is nothing to an animal that can go days or weeks without food if necessary. Once the new captive settles down to its new surroundings, gentle treatment with a lack of teasing and a gradual increase of familiarity with the animal is all that is needed to bring it around to being friendly and trainable. Baby animals: All baby animals should be offered food and water as soon as possible. Never withhold nourishment or water from young animals. They may refuse to eat at first but hunger will finally drive them to seek food and water. They are weak and young and will go into shock and die without nourishment. They are scared. Don't make them starve or thirst. It will kill them. Listed below are various tricks with different animal species. Obvious tricks such as teaching a dog to sit are not approached. Instead, unusual and unique tricks are brought together to give the performing animal wizard a wide base of stunts not often seen. Caution: some of the animal stunts below may be illegal and are offered only for informational background material. Always consult with local law enforcement for current statutes in your state concerning animal rights. The Stunts: Calling wild flocks of birds down from the trees You'll need an alarm clock, a blanket and a few pounds of birdseed. Birds hang out in trees at night to sleep. Once they wake up, they wait for full sunlight before flying off for the day. If you take up position under their tree before sunrise, the birds have a chance to see you and your food. Birds are hungry in the morning so your birdseed will certainly have their attention! Pick a large tree near your home as your target. Set your alarm to ring 1 hour or 2 before sunrise. In the pre-dawn morning (before even a hint of sunlight) go out to your tree and put down your blanket at the spot where you wish to call the birds. Lay down flat on your blanket (in the dark) and extend your arm with a handful of birdseed in your palm. Get comfortable! You must now lie still as the dawn approaches. As dawn lightens the sky, you'll begin to hear the birds waking up. They'll begin to chirp and chatter. You must begin to chirp or chatter, too. Decide on a short few whistle notes that are easy for you. This will be your command call or (dinner bell!). Pick something easy to whistle like HIGH, low ... HIGH, low. Just whistle a note or two, slowly repeating your call as the morning light approaches. If you can't whistle, just sing it: LA, la ... LA, la ... or some such. The birds will notice you and your food upon the blanket. The birds will hear your notes & will be curious. However, not one bird will fly down to you. The birds will talk and chatter and preen, watching you and listening to you but mostly afraid of you. Continue lying motionless upon the ground until one hour passes after daybreak. By this time most will have flown away. After the hour, just gather your blanket and walk away, finished with training for the day. On the second day repeat the entire process. On the second morning, 1 or 2 birds may come down and land nearby to take a closer look but still they won't come really close. On the third or forth day, you'll see signs of bolder approaches but real contact usually won't happen until the 5th or 6th day or more. As the birds come up to your hand to take their first pecks, you must reinforce your birdcall. Continue to whistle or singsong your few notes. As you whistle or call the first birds may startle or hop or fly backwards. They will quickly return. Repeat your call endlessly as you're approached. Continue daily with only minor variations for about 10 days. When you feel that the birds have become accustomed to you, rise up to a seated position. The birds will retreat but will quickly condition themselves to your new position. Stand erect. The birds will begin to alight upon your hand, arms and shoulders. They'll perch on your head. A few more training periods and the birds will fight with each other for the best landing positions upon you. The losers will take their place around your feet. Begin walking and they'll follow, now completely at home with you. Since you are always calling them as they feed, the birds will anticipate you and wait for you each day and will respond quickly to your call. To call strange birds in a new area, you must again go through the initial training period with the new flock. With time and diligence, you can develop several trained flocks in your area filled with birds waiting for your return. After a flock is trained, you may taper off your visits to a steady schedule of once or twice a week. Less frequent visits may require you to retrain the flock for a few mornings to remind them of who you are. Dedicate yourself to mastering this ancient magical feat. It's not particularly hard to do but it is astounding in impact! Just set aside a few hours each morning for a few weeks and you'll be amazed at the magic you can create! Trained Birds Combining your personal birds with the trained flocks packs a 1-2 punch. Raise a few birds as pets (a dove or finch is common). With gentle progression you can teach them to first perch on a finger, then a chair, then in the branches of a nearby tree. Each lesson must teach the birds to associate your call with food. When teaching them to sit in a tree, you must train them to wait longer and longer periods for your call. They will eventually wait an entire day for your return. Be mindful of early spring! Birds mate during the spring and their calls for mates may pull your bird away. To Bring a Dead Bird Back To Life Take a bird and gently hold it within the palm of your hand with your fingers completely surrounding the bird so that it can't flap its wings or move. Now take a cigar or cigarette (cigars are quicker) and start to blow large puffs of smoke at its beak. Repeat this process for about 2 minutes. The nicotine in the cigar or cigarette acts as a poison upon the bird and will cause the creature to pass out as if dead. Lay the bird upon the ground under a tree or bush and sprinkle a few mealworms upon and under its wings, giving the illusion that maggots have started to eat upon its body. You could even smear a bit of dead fish upon the bird to give the smell of death. You are now ready to restore life to the dead! Have a friend or whomever you wish to perform for go to the tree and bring you the body of the dead bird. They will probably hate picking it up but insist that they bring you the carcass. Put the bird in the palm of your hand; close your fingers around it so that your fingertips are over the side of the bird, directly over its wing. Now bring the bird up to your lips and blow hard down its beak and mouth while beginning to press and release the bird's side. This will pump air into and out of the bird's lungs while the fresh air you blow down its throat will help in providing oxygen. The bird will wake up in a few moments and will resume all normal actions. Back from the dead! Fish Buy a clicker, one of those metal things you press with your thumb that goes 'klick-click'. Sit by a lake or pond or slow river and put a stone in front of you on the ground, pressing or touching the clicker against it. Click it a few times while touching the stone and the sound will travel through the water to the fish. While clicking also throw a few pellets of fish food into the water. Now click the clicker again a few times and toss the food again. Click and throw, click and throw. Repeat this daily at the same time each day. Soon the fish in the water will learn that the clicking means food and will rush to your feeding spot. You can substitute a walking stick for the clicker. Just rap the stick hard upon a rock or the ground to produce sound before feeding. Trained fish! To Tame a Wild Horse Enter the horse's coral. He will run. Walk about the coral slowly and carefully so that the horse can see you whenever he turns his head towards you. If he ignores you at first, within 15 minutes or so he will stop moving and will turn his head towards you. When he looks, hold out your left hand and keeping perfectly still and begin to stare at it. It's a staring contest between you and the horse. If you look away the horse will bolt. Stare directly into the horse's eyes and watch for any body motion on the horse's part. The horse should freeze and return your stare. If the horse hasn't moved in 10 minutes but not less, begin to slowly advance towards him. You must move with no sound or quick movements, still staring him directly into the eyes. Your left hand is still extended flat with nothing in it. If the horse moves, stop and remain still until he quiets again, then advance again slowly with your left hand out. The horse will continue to look at you until you are close enough to touch its forehead. Raise your hand slowly be degree and touch just above the nostrils as lightly as possible. If the horse flinches repeat with quick, light strokes upon its forehead. Move farther along up towards its ears by degrees and then to its neck, always using both hands in the same manner upon each side of the horses neck and body. You'll be able to rope a wild horse in this manner. How To Make a Horse Follow You Wherever You Go This was once known as the biggest mystery of the circus. Once your horse learns this trick he'll follow you anywhere you go! Put your horse in large stable space where he can't get out. Place a halter or bridle on him. Spend a moment or two and say some gentle words to him then hold his halter and turn him towards you while touching him lightly over the hips with a long whip. Walk him the length of the stable while rubbing his neck, saying 'Come on, fella' or his name. Every time you turn at the end of the stable space, touch him lightly with whip to make him come up close to you then pet him firmly with your hand. Soon your horse will learn to hurry up to escape the taps of the whip and will love being caressed by you. Your horse will now follow without his halter. If your horse stops and turns from you during training, give him a few sharp cuts about the hind legs and it will quickly turn his head toward you. At that moment pet his neck quickly. A few lessons of this nature and your horse will walk after you up and down the stable space. 30 minutes of this training will do for the day. After 3 of these lessons in the stable take your horse out into a field and train him outside in the same manner. You can now take your horse into the road and he will follow and run after you for the rest of its life. To Teach a Horse To Kiss Give your horse a few pieces of apple from your hand then place a piece of apple between your teeth, sticking out a bit so that your horse can grab it. Say 'Kiss me' before putting the apple in place. Always reward your horse with a piece of apple between your teeth and your horse will quickly learn to kiss each time you say Kiss Me! To Let a Horse Walk Over You Without Harm Unless severely blinkered, a horse will not step on you or an animal on purpose. Let your assistant lead the horse over your legs while you are sitting on the ground, legs splayed out before you. After a few passes, lie down and let the assistant lead the horse over you from all directions. Soon you can lie down and let your horse walk over you without the assistant. Guide the horse by snapping your fingers in the direction that you want him to go. To Teach a Horse To Dance Fasten the horse with 2 side-reins between the posts of a leaping bar. Take a whip and as music begins to play, gently tap the horse with it upon its flanks. Since the horse is tied it can't move forward or backward but instead, it will lift its front legs. After a few days or a week of this training the rider mounts the back of the horse, the horse still tied between the posts with side-reins. As the horse is raising his front leg the rider should give a gentle pull to the rein at the proper side to help the horse with the movement. With further training the reins can be loosened and the horse will learn to 'mark time' with the music, fast or slow, with slight jerks of the bridle. At this point the rider dismounts and comes to the front of the horse and with a wave of the hand or taps upon the horses foot which is wanted to lift the horse can finish its training in dance. Although dancing horses in the circus appear to be keeping time with the circus band, it is usually the band that will keep time with the horse's movements. Mules Mules have lousy reputations. They are thought of as stubborn, lazy and stupid. Mules are by nature inclined to be rather stubborn but most often it is their trainers who are responsible for their bad natures. In breaking a mule, most trainers lose patience with the animal. But it is patience that leads to success. The mule is a timid animal and very afraid of man. When scared and frightened, mules kick! It is their main defense weapon. If you treat him kindly you will have little trouble in coaxing him to perform. When you break your mule, speak softly and gently. Grasp the animal with care not to startle or frighten him. Don't run, yell or jump about. Don't jerk at him or get excited. Approach and handle the mule as you would any animal that is already broken and with kindness you mule will be better trained and broken than if you had spent a month with a whip. Mules are born to kick. When starting to break a mule, teaching it not to kick must be the first lesson. If you use harsh treatment or a whip, you'll end up with a mule with a vicious kick. It may be more timid and afraid of you but as long as its afraid of you, you stand the danger of being kicked. You must convince the mule through kindness that you are not going to hurt or punish. The sooner the mule learns that you are 'safe' the sooner you are out of danger from those hooves! To Teach a Mule To Walk Across a Field Of Bottles Mules are very sure-footed. An excellent trick is watching a mule walk upon the very top-mouths of bottles. Take a sheet of plywood or a wide plank and cut out 10 holes for your bottles. Measure out your mule's footsteps in the mud and use these measurements to cut the holes. Old glass coke bottles are perfect but any bottle with thick glass may be used. Don't use thin-glassed beer bottles as they may shatter from the weight of the mule. Placement of the holes & bottles isn't critical... the mule will 'stretch' a bit to reach each bottle in turn. Now mount the cut plank above another with short blocks of wood to space the two and put the planks upon the ground and insert the bottles. You are ready to start training your mule. Bring the mule up to the beginning of the field of bottles. Lift the mule's front leg and place it on the first bottles neck, then the other forefoot upon another. Then the first foot is tapped with a whip to make him raise it and advance forward to the next bottle. As the mule reaches with the front foot, his hind foot is struck lightly to force him to place it on the now vacant bottle. Bring the mule through the field with the same motions to its end. Train him to walk the field 3 times each day, offering an apple or carrot as a reward each time. Within a week or two, the mule will walk calmly up to the bottles and step up and walk across without prompting. At this point you may remove the stabilizing planks. If the bottles are placed upon solid, level ground (concrete, wood or stone) they will not topple when the mule crosses. If you're still worried, fill the bottles with sand or water for weight if you must but it really isn't necessary. If the mule places his foot squarely on the top of the bottles as he's been trained to do, there is no danger of the bottles falling over or breaking. Dogs Teaching a Dog To Sneeze On Command Take a stiff feather and tickle the nostrils of your dog while saying 'Sneeze boy'. When the dog sneezes give him a treat. Repeat. Soon your dog will remember the feeling of the feather and will sneeze without it. To Teach a Dog To Bring Its Tail In His Mouth This trick is funny and most folks laugh when they see it performed. It is rather difficult for the dog to perform because it can only advance forward with something like a sideways crab walk and the dog will have a tendency to run around in circles rather than moving forward. The dog must have a bit of tail to work with. Dogs like to bite their tails and will often grab it in their mouths during playtime. When the dog bites his tail praise him and after a few moments say 'let go' and reward him. If he lets go before you order him to, speak sharply at him and start again. When he has learned to hold his tail until ordered to let go, the more difficult part of the trick begins: Bringing the tail to the trainer. Put the tail in the dog's mouth and step back a few feet away from the dog in the direction that the dog could easiest travel. Call the dog to come forward. If the dog lets go of his tail to come scold him and the tail replaced to start again. When the dog comes without letting go he should receive his treat. You may increase the distance required to walk but it seems cruel to make the dog walk like this for more than a few feet or so. When placing the tail in the dog's mouth, use a command like 'bring your tail' or some such to accustom the dog to the command. As you continue with this stunt the dog will learn by itself to grab his own tail, not needing the trainers help any further with that task. Teaching a Dog To Play Dead Dogs hate harsh words. Put your dog on his back or in any other posture you wish and speak sharply at him. Scold him and shake and threaten him with your forefinger while saying 'Fall dead'. If the command is used when placing the dog into position he will learn to take that position on hearing the fall dead command. To Teach a Dog To Walk On Stilts Purchase a 5-foot length of 1 inch by 1-inch stock pine and cut it into four 12-inch lengths. If you wish to make them longer, go no higher than 16 inches maximum. Now cut 4 small blocks 3 inches long from the remaining stock. Take a piece of 12 inch board and hold it up to your dogs front leg and place the end of it just below the knee joint. Mark with a pencil where your dog's wrist is (lift up the pad of his foot to judge). Do the same for all legs. Now glue the small blocks to the larger pieces using the pencil mark as a starting place. These small blocks are foot-pegs to take the weight of the animal. Now take a leather thong or belt and tack or fasten it to each stilt, 2 per stilt. These will be used to tie the 'pins' or stilts to the animal's legs. When using 4 stilts there is no particular training required. Just pick up the dog and place him upon all 4 wooden legs. There is no need to punish the dog when he stumbles. The fall is sufficient punishment enough for his failure. To teach the dog to walk upon 2 stilts on his hind legs is much more difficult but is possible. The dog must be taught to walk upon his back feet first, then put the stilts on his back legs. A leash attached to his collar and held in hand will help the dog maintain his balance until he becomes accustomed to the position. The dog cannot be trained to raise himself erect but must always depend on the trainer to help in this step. If your dog is missing a leg, the above wooden stilt cut to size can become an artificial leg for the animal. Chickens To Hypnotize a Chicken Chickens can be hypnotized into becoming motionless. Push or place the chicken's head to the ground. Its beak should lay flat upon the ground and its body should be straight out behind it. Take a piece of chalk, a stone or even a stick in the dirt and draw a 3-foot line straight out and away from the tip of its beak. Repeat several times drawing a straight line out and away from its beak. Now slowly let go of the bird and stand up. The bird will remain fixated upon the line on the ground and won't be able to move. It seems that since the eyes of the chicken are on the sides of its head, the act of watching the line drawn on the ground short circuits the chicken's brain. It receives a command that it can't perform and short wires. Thus the chicken will remain stuck. To release the chicken, push its head away from the line upon the ground. It will instantly resume its chicken life. To Find a Dollar Bill or Ring Within a Fresh Chicken Egg This is more of a magic trick. You must first boil the dollar bill or ring. If you decide to use a ring it must be small, lightweight and without stone or setting. Just a plain band will do. Boil the ring or dollar bill and allow them to cool. After the chicken lays its morning egg, the magician takes the ring or dollar bill and inserts the item deep within the birth canal of the chicken. An egg will form around the item so placed and will be expelled the next morning, the chicken none the worse for the ordeal. Boiling the item first kills any germs and lessens the chances of the experiment harming the fowl. Squirrels A captured baby or young squirrel can be tamed by carrying him in your pocket. The warmth and darkness of your pocket is pleasing to the animal and if you give your pocket traveler a peanut every once and a while, you'll convince him of your niceness. Squirrels can become so tame that they can be released back into the trees and will return to you by voice command. If you wish to make friends with new squirrels, start by leaving a few nuts or food near their tree and walk away. Each day come closer and closer to the food. When you are very close to the squirrels, you can drop small bits of food down and they will scamper at your feet for the morsels. When they have eaten what you've dropped, take a step backwards and drop another morsel. The animal will advance to get it. Step, drop, eat. In this manner, the animal will become so familiar with you that soon it will take food offered by your hand or will climb your leg and sit on your shoulder, cracking nuts and chattering in your ear! Bats It is fairly easy to catch bats. Get a powerful flashlight and a half dozen small pebbles or BB's. When the bat comes flying overhead, toss up one pebble or BB. Don't toss 2! The bat will think the pebble is a bug and will swoop down to catch it. As the bat comes close, blast it with the spotlight. It will tumble out of the air to the ground, stunned with light. Take a sturdy stick and offer it to the bats feet. Bats are unable to take off into flight from the ground and must climb up upon a tree or some such to take flight. The bat will grab the stick with its feet. Lift it up about 3 feet off the ground and it will take off and resume eating, none the worse from its adventure. Bats get a bad rap. Rabies, vampire stuff, old wives tales. If you take just a bit of care and keep your fingers away from their mouths, there is nothing to fear. They are fascinating creatures and look really cool close-up. In Germany bats are called Fledermäuse, which translates in English to flying mouse. Frogs & toads Frogs are difficult to catch alive. They will sense your approach and jump off into the pond long before you arrive. The best way to catch a frog is with a long-handled net. Approach the swamp or pond slowly. The frog can feel your feet stomping on the ground so tread softly. As you approach, look close along the waterline. Frogs sit perched and ready to jump back to the safety of the water. When you spring your net, you must try to come down in front of the frog so that it will jump into the net. If you try to catch him where he sits he will always beat you. Frogs must be kept in fresh water free of any contaminates. Gasoline, oil, wastewater or household chemicals will absorb through the frogs thin skin and kill it quickly. Frogs also require a resting spot from swimming. A rock or log in the water will do. Toads are much easier to catch and they don't require a bucket of water to live in. Toads usually come out around dusk and will always frequent the same stomping grounds night after night. Toads live in holes and you should always return the toad to wherever you found it so that it may return home. The author has several large toads that live around his house and once or twice a year the yard around the house is carpeted by hundreds of tiny baby toads! Some of these babies survive their first year and will sometimes hang around the older toads to hunt. If you use a red laser pointer, the small red dot is a great bait for catching toads or to make them jump! Frogs & toads with chase the red dot everywhere! After some handling, frogs and toads will eat live and dead insects from your fingers. Both creatures are excellent bug killers and deserve to live and prosper. Warning: Toads and frogs both pee when picked up for the first time. Many a toad has crashed to the ground with broken bones because some fool freaked out when the poor creature peed from fear in their hand. Just hold the toad or frog under its front legs with the back legs hanging down for a moment and it will finish peeing. Also, the animal doesn't know it's 5 feet in the air so hold them well and try not to let them crash to the ground when they try to jump from your hand. Standing over grass is much kinder to the little critter than the paved road should it escape and jump to the ground. Not a warning: Toads do NOT cause warts. Warts are viral infections and cannot be caught by handling toads. This old wives tale needs to die. Both toad and frog are harmless and beneficial creatures and should be respected as such. To Hypnotize a Frog Or Toad Place the creature gently upon its back. Now firmly stroke its underside from the tip of the mouth to the anus. Always stroke from head to butt. After a few strokes the animal will remain motionless. Picking it up will free it from being stunned. To Teach a Frog Or Toad To 'Press Weights' This is a standard trick and about the only stunt done with props for these creatures. Make a small barbell weight from disks of cardboard, a spot of glue and a toothpick or cotton swab. When the creature is on its back and hypnotized, put the stick in its hands and press its belly slightly. It will clutch at the toothpick or swab and lift. It may repeat this several times... up & down, up & down. Your frog/toad is pressing weights and bulking up its muscles! Turtles A land-turtle or tortoise can be taught to come on command. (Never keep water-turtles caught in the wild as pets. They need special care and diet and will usually die if taken from their homes.) Your captured land-turtle (check local laws. Some species of tortoise and turtle are protected by law) should be placed in an area where it can't escape. The living room should do. Every day the turtle should be placed in a bathtub or large pan with just enough water to cover its feet. Never put a land-turtle in water deeper than its shell, it can drown. The turtle will extend its head and neck and drink deeply if so inclined. It will also drink enough water to expel waste through its system. Leave the turtle in water for at least a half-hour a day but never in water so deep that it can't lift its head into the air to breathe. The land-turtle needs to eat everyday. It can last weeks and months without food but it enjoys eating daily. Bring a small salad on a white napkin to the center of the room and put it upon the floor where the turtle can see it. (You can also offer your turtle mealworms purchased at most pet shops. Turtles love mealworms & grubs!) Sit motionless. If so inclined, the turtle will come over to the food and eat. After bringing the salad on a white napkin for a few weeks, the turtle will learn that the white napkin means food! If you drop a napkin on the floor and say 'Come turtle', it will clomp over to the napkin looking for its dinner. A trained turtle! Always return turtles to the spot they were found unless that area is considered to dangerous for the animal. Land-turtles enjoy a mix of forest and brush cover. A field near a stand of woods is ideal. They dig deep holes and can live half a century or more in the same hole. You may also notice that larger turtles leave trails of beaten grass nearby as they make their daily rounds looking for food. Follow the trail and you'll find the turtle sooner or later. Cats Like most people you change and clean the litter box endlessly. Here's how to train your cat to use the toilet in your bathroom. Your cat must be litter trained first. Kittens up to 6 months old are too young for toilet training. Really old cats may also be too difficult to toilet train. Purchase a cheap toilet seat. Attach the toilet seat to the top of the litter pan (a shallow litter pan no more than 3 inches high) with adhesive tape or duct tape. The center hole must remain clear of tape. The idea here is to mimic the look of the actual toilet so leave the lid up and the seat down over your litter pan. Put the litter pan next to the toilet where you wish the cat to relieve itself. Your cat will inspect the new scenario you've placed in front of it and will usually walk around and around the edge of the seat testing for stability. Then, amazingly, your cat will perch on the seat with their behind over the litter and relieve themselves. Continue to clean the litter pan daily as you normally do. Allow your cat to use the new toilet-seat litter pan for 3 days. If your cat refuses to perch on the seat and steps into the middle of the pan and ignores the seat completely, don't fret. Your cat will feel crowded and will discover the seat edge by himself. Don't try to put the cat on the seat by hand. It will only confuse him. If after 3 or 4 days your cat still won't use the edge of the seat, take a long strip of duct tape about a half-inch wide and put it under the toilet seat, across the hole and over the litter with the sticky side up. Since your cat is litter trained from the beginning, you cat will circle around the edge until it decides that it must balance to relieve himself. The nice part of training your cat to use the toilet is that the cat will train himself. You only modify or change the surroundings. The cat will change its behavior to accommodate the changes you make. When your cat will use the seat lid, remove the tape in the center. Let the cat use the modified litter pan for a few days. When you're sure that the cat is comfortable, raise the pan 1 inch off the floor with books, magazines or blocks of wood. The pan must be stable. Your cat will sniff, then step up into the raised pan. Allow the cat to use the raised pan for a day, and then raise it another inch. Continue to raise the pan an inch a day. If the cat shows resistance to a new level of height, leave the pan where it's at and wait for the cat to become comfortable, then resume the inch a day rise until the bottom of the litter pan is level with the seat of the toilet. During this process the cat will first step up, then jump up and onto the height of the litter pan without trouble. During this entire training the lid of your toilet must be up with the seat down. This will allow your cat to see and become used to the toilet. Your cat may even use the real seat as a platform to jump up into its box. Be patient. If your cat seems stupid, don't despair. Most cats will learn to balance on the seat within a week or so, although some may even take even longer. Also, don't get to close to watch! If you talk or hang around while the cat is trying to position itself your cat may begin to associate you with the litter pan and will only use it if you're around. Not a good thing! Try to observe from afar if possible. Once the pan is level with the toilet, wait 3 days for the cat to become accustomed to the process. On the 3rd day, slide the litter box an inch or two onto the real toilet seat. The cat won't even notice the difference. Move it over a bit more the next day and the next until the litter box is completely on the toilet. Take the books or magazines away. Use duct tape wherever needed to join the pan to the toilet. It must be secure! Your cat may be a bit confused by the sudden disappearance of the stack of books. Wait a day or two before resuming training... when the cat has lost its confusion and easily jumps up and relieves himself you may continue. By now your cat should be ready to use the real toilet. Remove the fake toilet seat litter box and put it somewhere your cat won't be able to smell it. Your cat will be totally confused if it smells the litter box hiding under your sink so clean it well before storing it away. Lift the seat and lid of your toilet and take a sheet of plastic wrap and completely cover the top of the bowl. Use duct tape or adhesive tape to hold the plastic in place. If you purchased self-cling wrap, tape it anyway. It's important that the plastic is secure. While you are taping the plastic in place, put a small cup or paperweight at the center to make a depression. When done taping, put about a cup of cat litter into the depression at the center of the plastic and lower the seat into place leaving the cover up. Your cat's next visit to the bathroom will be a big moment! Your cat will jump up onto the seat and find things pretty much as they were before. Your cat will get into position above the litter and relieve himself. You're almost done! You're just a day or two away from success! After your cat has soiled the plastic, refresh the plastic stretched across the bowl but this time cut a hole the size of a golf ball in the center & sprinkle a bit of cat litter around the hole. Your cat's next visit will allow your cat to see and hear the water and will begin to become accustomed to the sound made during elimination. As the next few days go by continue to replace the soiled plastic with fresh pieces of plastic with larger & larger holes. Reduce the amount of litter you sprinkle around the hole. By now your cat is well adjusted to using a toilet & you can stop putting plastic and litter across the top of the bowl. If you remember to leave the bathroom door open with the lid up and the seat down, your cat will use the toilet daily. No more messy litter pans and smelly litter! Final note: If you have a female cat and it becomes pregnant, you must provide a litter box. Not only for the swollen cat but so that the kittens may be taught how to use a litter pan. The kittens are too small to make the jump up to your toilet so the litter pan is mandatory. Once the kittens have grown, your mother cat will need very little coaxing to return to the toilet. Gnats It may be noticed that gnats group and fly together in a swarm. They usually amass over some point upon the ground... an old stump or stone. They are fascinating to watch as they swarm! With no outward sign, all of the insects will move in the same direction at the same time much like a school of fish or flock of birds in air. A swarm of gnats can be commanded to come to you! When you encounter a flying swarm massed over some point, stand about 10 to 20 feet away and hum loud and low. The vibration from your humming will excite the swarm (you'll see them flying & darting more quickly than before). As you hum, the swarm will suddenly shoot over and fly around you! If you stop humming, the swarm will sort of stay for a little while but will usually migrate back to the point from where they started. Trained gnats! Bees Import a small colony of honeybees into an area. Now you can perform a calling of the bees. Stand in the front of the beehive with a small test-tube of honey or a bit of honey on a stick. Hold it as you would a burning candle, open end up. The bees will quickly discover the honey and will circle above your hand, each waiting their turn to feed from the tube/stick. Increase your position daily farther and farther away from the hive. The bees will fly to the general area where they last remembered finding you and will circle the area and hunt you out. Once they find you and your honey, they will fly back and forth to the colony, bringing more and more bees each visit. Remember, when bees are full they won't sting. Use sugar water or honey to keep them well fed. If you are out in the wild, watch for bees' flying. The bees will head off toward their hive after feeding. Follow them. Walk forward for 50 paces and wait. A bee will come zooming out of nowhere, either on its way to the food or back to the hive. Bees always follow the same line in the air. A bee highway! Wait for a bee that is returning to its hive and walk forward another 50 paces in the direction that the bee took. In this manner you'll discover the hive. It is possible to freeze bees. Put a few bees into a container and put in the refrigerator. Once they become cold, transfer the bees to the freezer. The freezer must be set to 30 degrees, no colder or it may damage or kill them. Check on the bees every 30 minutes or so. They will eventually lie as dead. If put into a cooler with ice you can keep the bees in suspended animation for quite some time. To bring the bees back, just bring the container into a warm room. They'll soon wake up. Bee stings seem to help those with joint pain in the hands. Take the bee between your fingers or with wooden tongs and hold it above the knuckle that needs relief. Allow the bee to sting the knuckle. Unfortunately, this will kill the bee. Bees die when they sting. It rips the stinger from the abdomen. Leave the stinger in the knuckle for 10 minutes. The ripped stinger will continue to pump toxin into the knuckle, bringing relief to the swollen joint. Housefly The lowly housefly has the remarkable ability to really come back from the dead! To perform this amazing stunt you must first capture a fly. Place a piece of raw hamburger in a jar and leave by an open window. With luck, in a few hours or so you will have drawn the attention of a half dozen flies. Cover the jar with its lid and go to a small, closed room such as the bathroom. Get a small glass jar and lid. Fill the jar half full of water. Now capture one of the flies and put it inside the jar, pushing the fly underwater with the end of a pencil. You must be very careful not to damage the fly in any way. A crushed housefly will not come back from the dead. The water tension in the jar prevents the fly from crawling up out of the water and traps him below the waterline. It will live for a while upon the air trapped around its body but it will drown after a few hours. You now have a dead, drowned housefly. If you did nothing now, the fly would never regain its life. It IS dead! To restore its life you must perform the following within 24 hours of its demise: gently remove the fly from the water and place upon a bare tabletop. Take a shaker of salt, open the top and pour a small heap of salt on the wet dead fly. Be careful not to cover its eyes. The fly will regain its life in about 10 minutes. If left alone, it will crawl out from the mound and clean itself, then test and dry its wings by flapping them, then it will fly away none the worse for the adventure! NOTE: If you color the salt by mixing it with cigarette ash and shaking the two together, you can mask the fact that you're using salt. Keep you mixed salt in a small wooden box and tell how the mysterious powder inside has the ability to restore life... and you can demonstrate with the fly. Blackstone, the great magician of the early 1900's declared that this trick was the greatest he had ever known and was disappointed that he was unable to perform it on stage to a large crowd. Snakes Snakes get a really bad rap, too. Just about everyone fears them yet very few are poisonous and even the bite of a poison snake rarely kills. However, because of the innate fear that humans have of snakes, your ability to interact with them will make your reputation! The rule with snakes is, if it looks like an arrow (its head larger than its neck) it's poisonous. If the head and neck are streamlined, without a bulge where they meet, its bite is harmless. It may still bite but its small teeth will only sting, not kill. Snakes are deaf. However, they can feel vibration in the ground. When hunting snakes, always walk slowly with as little stomping as possible. In this manner it's quite possible to walk directly up to the snake with it being unaware of you. Also, just like frogs and toads, snakes will defecate when you pick them up. Snake poop smells terrible but if you're aware of what's to come, you won't drop the snake in surprise. Never hold a snake by the very tip of its tail. The tail is not strong enough to hold its weight and my break or become injured by the twists and turns the snake will make in trying to escape. If you're frightened of being bit, wear thick gloves. Even if the snake is small, they may try to take a nip at you. If the snake manages to clamp onto you, press firmly just behind its jaws to open its mouth. Wash the wound with alcohol or antiseptic as soon as possible. Most snake bites become infected with bacteria but again, it won't kill you. Snakes seek shade. Knowing this, it's possible to make them come to you. Place your snake in the middle of a large sunny area. Stand or squat about 10 feet away and wait. The snake will see the darkness caused by your shadow and will make its way over to you. Snake charmers in India use this little-known secret to fool the crowds. They hide snakes around the Town Square and position themselves in the town center, knowing that the snakes will seek them out for shade and comfort. After collecting the reptiles, the charmer collects a few rupees from the crowd for the service of removing such creatures and heads off to the next town to repeat the performance. Baby snakes can also be used for a sideshow freak stunt. If the baby garden snake (about 6 inches long) is introduced into your nostril, the snake will slither up into the nose. The performer pinches at the tail, prompting the snake to move forward. The snake will continue to enter and will pop out at the back of the throat. The performer uses his tongue to prompt the snake to enter the mouth where it makes its reappearance to the grossed-out crowd. NEVER PUT THE SNAKE IN THE MOUTH AND PROMPT IT TO GO UP INTO THE NASAL CAVITY! The snake may decide to go up into the sinus behind the eyes instead of coming out at the nose. If it does that, YOU WILL DIE! The snake will never come out, will die, rot and fill your head with poison. There is no way to get the snake out! A surgeon would have to cut your skull open to get it out. Not good! Rats Rats are so smart! They are clever and will perform amazing feats once trained. Behavior modification with food is the quickest, easiest way to train a rat. What do you want it to do? Rats can be taught to play basketball, picking up a ping-pong ball and dropping it through a hoop placed at rat height. To accomplish this or any training task, break down the desired action into small steps. Let's use basketball as the example. Withhold food for 24 hours (plenty of water but no food). Put the hoop and ping-pong ball in the rat's cage. When the rat goes over to the ball and touches it, drop one pellet of food. The rat eats. When the rat touches the ball again, another pellet dropped. Once the rat learns that touching the ball means food, change the rules. Now the rat must touch the ball with its hand for food. Then it must touch it with both hands for food. Then it must pick up the ball for food. Then it must pick up the ball and move towards the hoop for food. Etc., etc. By slowly changing the expected behavior, you can teach a rat to do anything. This is called behavior modification. There was a story circulating in my college (way back when!) that a psychology class decided on the first day of classes to modify the behavior of the teacher! They decided that they wanted the teacher to stand on a chair as the final result of training. They broke down the desired effects into small tasks. First, the teacher would have to be on the left side of the classroom. If he stood on the right, the students wouldn't respond but if he stood on the left, they were all ears. Then, the class would only respond when the teacher was near his chair. Then he had to touch the chair. Then he had to touch the chair with a foot. Then a foot upon the chair. Etc., etc. I don't know if the story was true but it sure sounds like it would work. If everyone decided to tell you that you looked terrible and that you looked sick, by the end of the day you would feel awful, even though you were really just fine! Behavior modification works! Final Thoughts If you decide to be known as a wizard, an animal trainer or as someone with control over nature, you should take full advantage of random events that may happen near you. If a large bird flies overhead, tell how it has just started to follow you everywhere you go. If you see birds nearby, proclaim that they've just arrived to be with you. If birds begin chirping, explain how they're speaking with you ("A little bird told me!"). Take advantage of everything around you! If you see an insect, tell how they seem drawn to you. If a cat rubs on your leg, explain that the cat is trying to speak with you. Once you demonstrate the tricks and commands that you have over the animal kingdom, people will want to believe that you cause ALL of the animal and creature manifestations around you. If you carefully choose your special moments to flash your magic animal control, you'll become known as someone who has the gift of controlling nature. A powerful wizard or witch! Copyright 1994-2001, 2006 - Novel Discoveries Inc. - All rights reserved